Harry's Turmoil
by Petouille
Summary: What will happen when Harry will get his position back as the Gryffindor seeker ? Should he apologise to Ginny ?


/* Thanks to Miara Rigawa who made me notice my numerous mistakes. (Damn that MsWord who corrected this English text with French dictionnary ! lol). Hope they are, for the most, corrected. Have a good reading! */ 

HARRY'S TURMOIL

"I hate potions!" Harry said, sulking in his armchair.

He was hopelessly trying to write his essay due for the next day. But he was undoubtedly failing. He sucked at Potions and had hoped once to give up this class for his 6th ear, but he hadn't the choice. To become an auror, he had to pass that class.

"Do you hate potions or Snape?"

Harry turned to Ginny. His mood lightened and he smiled "Both, of course."

"Do you need help?"

Harry winced "It's a 6th year's essay..."

"I wasn't thinking of me. You could ask to Hermione."

They both looked at Hermione, who was studying her Herbology book. Sat next to her, not entirely focused on his homework, Ron was looking at her.

Ginny and Harry looked at each other. Harry opened the mouth but Ginny cut him.

"Don't ask me." She said smiling.

Harry frowned. "You know something?"

"Nope, nothing you already know."

"I hope I won't be the last to know if something ever happens between these two."

"Same for me."

"By the way Ginny..." Harry smiled with a devilish look. "How is it going with Dean?"

"Dean?" Ginny looked surprised. "What's with Dean?"

Harry was a little confused. He thought she was interested in Dean. At least, it was what he had understood while leaving Hogwarts the year before.

"Well, last year... I thought you..."

"That I liked him? My Gosh, Harry, I was joking." Ginny looked at Dean and made a face. "Uh, no, I was definitely joking."

Harry smiled a bit. "Yeah, like Ron said, you deserve better."

"Yeah, I think that too." Ginny laughed. 

"And do you think there is someone better than Dean?"

"What'd you mean? Of course, there are better guys than Dean." Ginny continued to laugh.

"Well, no. I meant. Uh, are you interested in someone?"

Ginny looked at Harry, quite puzzled. "Uh, Harry, I don't think I can talk about that with you."

Harry asked her why. "Well, because you're a guy, and because we're not really close to each other...  I mean if I was interested in a guy, Hermione would probably be the first to know."

"Oh, I understand. Uh, sorry..."

"Oh, you don't have to be sorry... But I mean, it's like I'm asking you about Cho... If you're over her..."

"Well, I'm over her. See, I can tell you that."

Ginny smiled. "Ok, no problem, you can talk to me about girls, but I won't talk to you about guys."

Harry stretched himself in the armchair. "Come on Ginny!"

"You're playing with me, I hate that!" Ginny said, trying to be serious.

"Not at all, I just want to know more about you. Is that forbidden?"

"Know more about me? Pff, Harry, you know me for about 4 years, what do you need to know more about... I won't speak about guys to you, that's all."

Ginny's question tickled Harry's mind. Well, yeah, why was he interested to know more about her now? He didn't really want to know her more; he just wanted to know more about the people who had fought with him in the department of mysteries... Really, he just wanted to see if he had something in common with her.

The next day, Harry met Ginny while going to the pitch to practice Quidditch. "Hey, what are you doing here?" He asked. "Coming to support us?"

Ginny frowned at him. "Uh, no. Coming to see if I can be useful this year." And she quickly went to the girls' cloakroom. It suddenly hit Harry: Ginny was the seeker of Gryffindor last year, while he was banished. How could he have forgotten that?

Some minutes later on the pitch, Harry tried several times to catch Ginny's eyes. But she wasn't looking at him. He wanted to apologize for his stupid question. 

"Harry... HARRY!" Angelina shouted.

"Uh, yeah."

"You're already looking for the snitch?"

"Uh, no, sorry, I'm listening."

"Ok... Now, everyone's is listening, I would like to say that..."

Quickly Harry's mind began to wander once again. Who would be the seeker this year? Of course, he loved Quidditch, and it would kill him to be out of the team this year again... But Ginny would be disappointed for giving up the seeker place.

"Harry, "Harry heard his name and focused again on Angelina's speech. "You, of course, will be the seeker this year."

Harry immediately looked at Ginny and saw that she was avoiding his eyes.

"And Ginny?" He asked, still looking at her.

"Were you listening to me? I've just said she will be replacing someone if one's get hurt."

"But that's not fair..." Harry tried to protest but Angelina wasn't listening to him.

A soon as he could, he tried to talk to Ginny.

"I'm sorry."

"It's ok, I don't care." She answered, her teeth clenched.

"Yes, you do."

She turned to him. "No, I do not care, Harry. Leave me alone." And she started to leave.

Harry caught her arm and made her turn to him again.

"If you didn't care, you wouldn't act like that."

"Harry, I don't care. Forget that. It's totally normal you get your position back."

She forced herself to smile. "I'm fine, I'm ok."

Harry smiled awkwardly "Really?"

She sighed and smiled, seeming tired of fighting. "Yes. Enjoy yourself."

Harry kept smiling. "Ok... Thanks." Harry released her arm.

She began to walk back to the castle.

"I'll walk with you!" Harry said.

She turned to him for the last time and she said "You have to change. I'll be in the common room though."

Harry smiled "Ok, see you."

She smiled and left.

Harry didn't see Ginny in the common room that evening. According to Hermione, she had felt tired and had gone to bed quickly. Obviously, Ginny wasn't ok with Harry getting his position back, and he knew it. On one hand, he didn't really know what to do to make her feel better, and on the other hand, it didn't really know why it was bothering that much. Lately, he had noticed he had started to watch her every time they were in the same room. He was at ease with her, just like with Hermione and Ron, not really forcing himself as he did with everyone since Sirius's death. When he was with his friends, he was just himself. And since he was back at Hogwarts, he felt that Ginny was now one of his closest friends. And that evening, Harry was feeling lonely, even if Hermione kept talking about the classes and Ron about Quidditch. Harry thought at Ginny earlier on the pitch. She really seemed disappointed for not being a part of the Quidditch team this year. Harry felt his tummy fluttered. He sat up as he opened his eyes widely.

"What's wrong Harry?" Hermione asked.

Harry blushed. "Uh, nothing."

Hermione looked around the room. Harry has just reacted as if he had seen some girl to impress. She saw Ginny enter the common room. Hermione looked at Harry. He was totally focused on her. Could it be possible that he... Hermione didn't have the time to finish her thought, when Ginny approached them, Harry stood up, ran his fingers into his hair.

"Here, you can sit here."

Ginny glanced at Harry. He definitely looked strange. She sat in the armchair. "Thanks."

Harry apologizes "Uh, sorry guys, but I will have to leave you for tonight. Uh, I... I'm not feeling well."

Ron raised his head and frowned. "Are you ok?" Ron asked as he fingered a scar on his forehead. Harry understood his friend was worrying about his scar. "Uh, yes, it's not...Well... I'm going. Good night."

Harry barely looked at Ginny. He suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable and left for his tower.

Hermione asked to Ginny "What's going on?"

Ginny looked at her perplexed. "What, what's going on?"

"Have you noticed how Harry just acted?"

Ginny smiled. "Oh, that! Don't worry... He's just feeling bad because he is the seeker again and that I'm not anymore."

"Really? And are you ok with that?" Hermione asked.

"I don't care. That's what I told him. I was just a replacement for the team. It's ok."

Later that night, Ginny tried hard to sleep. "Just a replacement..." She said it was ok, but it wasn't ok. She really liked playing Quidditch, and somehow it pissed her off that she was leaving her position to Harry. Ok, he was better than her, that, she couldn't deny, but still, she was disappointed. "A replacement..." She didn't want to be a replacement.

Harry had hard times to get to sleep too that night. He couldn't deny what he had felt that evening. It was the same with Cho, these things in the stomach, the heart quickening... Why Ginny? Why now? Everything was going ok with her; he has just begun to know her better. Nothing like Cho. He didn't know Cho, he just found her very pretty. But Ginny... He had never found Ginny pretty, he has just thought she was, uh, ok, well, he didn't really see her as a girl. But she was. And now, he had to admit it, she was a pretty one, a very pretty one. 

The next days, Harry had hoped that he would have been simple for him to avoid Ginny. Being around her was making him all strange and he hated that. But, of course, he also hated to be far from her. He had been used to be near her, the evenings in the common room. He couldn't stop seeing her just like that. Furthermore, she wouldn't understand why he was avoiding her, and Hermione and Ron wouldn't understand too. Hermione wasn't stupid. She had asked Harry the next morning why he was acting strange when Ginny was here.

"There's no shame to say you like her, Harry."

Harry was hearing these words Hermione had pronounced, every time he was seeing Ginny. He liked her, and the more he admitted it to himself, the more he liked her.

"Why don't you ask her what she feels?"

Hermione was a girl; she knew what she talked about. But admitting he liked Ginny was satisfying enough for Harry. If he asked her what she felt and if she answered what he didn't want to hear, he would be crushed. He could only wish for her happiness and was very thoughtful towards her.

His attentions to Ginny became quickly clear to everyone who was around them but Ginny didn't seem to notice. Harry was kind to her so she wouldn't feel depressed by not playing Quidditch. He was nice but he was also overprotective and Ginny didn't want so much protection. She already had 6 brothers, she didn't need another one.

"Ginny, I heard you quit the team?" Harry went to her table in the common room.

"Well, yeah."

"Why?"

"Because I'm no use on a bench, Harry!"

Harry frowned at her. "You're wrong."

"Harry, " She looked at him patiently, "I'm just sitting for hours watching you guys playing. It's not interesting."

"Oh..."

"Harry, don't look so disappointed. You have the chance to play, enjoy yourself, I already told you that."

Harry looked at her. "If I quit myself, you could get the position." He muttered.

Ginny looked at him in shock. "Harry! You're crazy!"

She burst into laughs. "You shouldn't make that kind of jokes!"

He didn't laugh. "I'm serious."

Ginny stopped laughing. "No, you're not. Stop that!"

Harry raised his voice. "I am, trust me, I'll quit."

Ginny stood there, not knowing what to do.

"Harry, you stop that now! I'm not a spoiled child, I can live without Quidditch."

She pointed her finger at him. "And... I don't need another brother, so stop being overprotective to me."

Harry frowned at her. "What?! I don't want to be your brother."

Ginny sighed. "Fine. But don't quit for me... Please."

Harry scowled himself. "Fine. You don't even understand. Good night."

And then he left, leaving Ginny perplexed. What was going on with him? He was really acting stupid, Ginny thought.

During the next days, Harry barely talked to anyone. He wanted to avoid Ginny the most he could. But it was without counting on Hermione who kept asking him what he had said to Ginny. Ginny had come to her, and had asked her why Harry had been acting strange. Ginny had laughed when Hermione had said Harry had been interested in her.

"I know him, if he had, he would have come to ask me to go to Hogsmeade, just like a normal guy."

Hermione had answered. "You don't know him. He's not a normal guy, you should know that!"

And when Harry finally told Hermione what had happened with Ginny, Hermione couldn't believe her ears. "You wanted to quit the Quidditch team?"

"Well, yeah, she would have taken my position."

Hermione had smiled. "Oh, God, Harry, you really have to ask her out. I would have never thought you would be able to give up Quidditch for a girl."

"I'm not quitting anymore. She didn't want to me."

"Well, you listened to her in fact. That's nice of you."

"You don't understand Hermione."

"Yeah, I'm a girl, I don't understand."

"You didn't help me."

"I had told you to ask her what she felt. Have you done it? No... I can't do more than that."

"Fine then! I'll go ask her!"

Harry left right away. Wow, he really was sensitive, Hermione thought.

"I hate potions!" muttered Ginny while writing her essay.

"Do you hate Potions or Snape?" Harry asked, sitting next to her.

"You scared me."

"Sorry."

"I hate both." She smiled. "Like you."

"Do you need help?"

"If I need help I'll ask to Hermione."

"Does it mean that I suck at Potions?" Harry smiled.

"Well, you do suck at Potions."

"True."

Ginny crossed her arms on her essay and looked at him.

"So, are you going to talk to me again?"

"I've always talked to you."

"Not true."

"Ok, I've just uh, avoided you these last days."

"No way, I didn't notice."

Ginny was still smiling, and Harry didn't know what to answer. He couldn't ask her bluntly if she felt something for him, and this thought made him blush.

"Oh, Hermione... Hermione said to me something really, uh, interesting."

Ginny didn't know if she had to finish. And if it was true, wouldn't it be awkward after that?

"What?"

"Uh, she, uh ... Well..." Ok, she would turn the story differently. "She said we acted like a couple..." She smiled.

Harry was surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah..." Ginny giggled a bit.

"Oh and..." Harry blushed. "Does it sound bad?"

"What?"

"Well... Me, you, a couple..."

Ginny didn't know what to think, was Harry trying to know her feelings? What could she answer...?  "Uh, I don't know..."

Harry smiled "I don't know either."

Immediately, Harry cursed himself for not telling the truth. If she didn't return his feelings, he would be quite laughable. Why was it so hard? While looking at Harry, Ginny felt her heart quicken. She hadn't noticed she was so much attracted to him. Harry broke the silence as he muttered "Ginny, uh, like I said, uh, I don't want to be your brother."

Ginny felt a pang in her heart. "Fine... because I wouldn't kiss one of my brothers..."

She leaned towards Harry and slowly kissed him. And that was the answer at all his questions.

/* Ok, I don't know, I'm not satisfied with that fic; just tell me what you think. And : Don't flame me because of the english grammar! It's not my mother tongue. Thanks! Hope you enjoyed yourself a bit.*/


End file.
